It takes a village to raise a strong-willed girl
I have strategically worked on raising my daughter to be an independent, strong-willed girl that can think for herself. I have taught her it’s okay to voice her opinion and to embrace the way she feels. Over the years from meeting many mothers and daughters, I’ve learned that strong-willed mothers can directly affect whether their daughters will be strong-willed or not. But not until recently did I realize that it also takes the voices of other women to reinforce the message.
My daughter and I were recently being interviewed for an article about what it’s like to be a girl growing up with a strong-willed mother who is also an entrepreneur. I had envisioned the interview flowing smoothly and Tori, my daughter beaming how her mother had encouraged her to speak her mind and grow up thinking she could be anything she wanted. My vision quickly turned in a learning session within minutes.
My daughter, age 10, sat twirling her hair and snickering with the thought of discussing her feelings about me. She squiggled in her seat trying to find her comfort zone. She laughed out loud first and said I was “mean”, then quickly retracted with a glance and smile to me and proceeded with a more serious tone. “My mom encourages me, she’s someone who gets stuff done and is always there for me” she stated. However, as the conversation progressed it became clear that I wasn’t the only strong-willed female influence in her life.
“I wanna be a lawyer when I grow up” Tori said. “My Aunt is an environmental lawyer for the Justice Department; I wanna help the environment like she does. She’s also stands up and fights for what she believes in, even if everyone is against her” she said. My mouth fell to the floor, I didn’t know she even knew what her Aunt did for a living, and none the less saw her as a role model. Tori proceeded further with feelings about her Grandmother, Great-Grandmother, Nana and even her 5th grade teachers. “My Great-Grandmother is 77 and does everything on her own, my Grandmother is 73 and runs a horse farm and my Nana is the most caring person that puts everyone before her” she said. “Miss McCurdy and Miss Gallagher, my 5th grade teachers, are definitely strong-willed. They don’t let the boys get away with anything” she said laughing. “They are a lot of fun”.
I was bewildered. Shocked. It was clear, not only does it take a mother to raise a strong-willed girl but an entire village. The women in her life that were standing up and speaking out for their independence where also impacting her, they were reinforcing the message that was coming from home. She was identifying with women in the real world that were strong-willed. Tori was finding her place in society.
The interview closed with over three pages of notes and a young girl obviously impacted by the women in her life. And while the article has yet to come out for the world to read, it has already impacted one mother. Thank you to women that have impacted by daughter and drove the message home for her to be strong-willed.
Cheers to the village of women that are helping raise our girls to be strong-willed.
My daughter and I were recently being interviewed for an article about what it’s like to be a girl growing up with a strong-willed mother who is also an entrepreneur. I had envisioned the interview flowing smoothly and Tori, my daughter beaming how her mother had encouraged her to speak her mind and grow up thinking she could be anything she wanted. My vision quickly turned in a learning session within minutes.
My daughter, age 10, sat twirling her hair and snickering with the thought of discussing her feelings about me. She squiggled in her seat trying to find her comfort zone. She laughed out loud first and said I was “mean”, then quickly retracted with a glance and smile to me and proceeded with a more serious tone. “My mom encourages me, she’s someone who gets stuff done and is always there for me” she stated. However, as the conversation progressed it became clear that I wasn’t the only strong-willed female influence in her life.
“I wanna be a lawyer when I grow up” Tori said. “My Aunt is an environmental lawyer for the Justice Department; I wanna help the environment like she does. She’s also stands up and fights for what she believes in, even if everyone is against her” she said. My mouth fell to the floor, I didn’t know she even knew what her Aunt did for a living, and none the less saw her as a role model. Tori proceeded further with feelings about her Grandmother, Great-Grandmother, Nana and even her 5th grade teachers. “My Great-Grandmother is 77 and does everything on her own, my Grandmother is 73 and runs a horse farm and my Nana is the most caring person that puts everyone before her” she said. “Miss McCurdy and Miss Gallagher, my 5th grade teachers, are definitely strong-willed. They don’t let the boys get away with anything” she said laughing. “They are a lot of fun”.
I was bewildered. Shocked. It was clear, not only does it take a mother to raise a strong-willed girl but an entire village. The women in her life that were standing up and speaking out for their independence where also impacting her, they were reinforcing the message that was coming from home. She was identifying with women in the real world that were strong-willed. Tori was finding her place in society.
The interview closed with over three pages of notes and a young girl obviously impacted by the women in her life. And while the article has yet to come out for the world to read, it has already impacted one mother. Thank you to women that have impacted by daughter and drove the message home for her to be strong-willed.
Cheers to the village of women that are helping raise our girls to be strong-willed.
posted by Head Redhead at 9:59 AM
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